Platinum End

Episode 5

I get the impression Platinum End really, deeply regrets making Mirai its protagonist. Try as it might, the series just cannot think of a single thing for him to do in this narrative. And I get it – on top of having no discernible personality, this boy is a character defined by inaction. He's purely reactive, has only a vague goal of “being happy” as his driving motivation, and has essentially been railroaded into a death game that he is neither inclined nor equipped to take part in. This story is a big, multi-party battle for supremacy with at-once simple and complicated supernatural powers that are all but made to be exploited by the brilliant and remorseless. In any other show Mirai would be a side character helping out and providing an emotional barometer for the actual hero.

It seems the show realized that a few weeks too late, and has seen fit to airdrop in a new protagonist who can actually do things besides hide in his girlfriend's bedroom. Mukaido isn't exactly an amazing new character, partly because he only has two pieces of plywood named Mirai and Saki to talk to this episode, but his hastily-delivered backstory already has way more going for it than Mirai's convoluted tale of familial assassination. He's a man with little time left, who's decided to dedicate the final days of his life to trying to make the world better – or at least keep it from getting worse at the hands of a madman. He also had a pretty clever idea to track down other Candidates in the chaos of Metropoliman's hullabaloo last week, and generally seems infinitely more competent than our other leads. Plus there's a lot to be mined from how he frames himself. He stole money, seemingly from people who wouldn't miss it, in order to support his family after he dies, and considers that proof he shouldn't become God. I don't necessarily agree – somebody willing to act in the benefit of others while taking care to minimize harm seems pretty responsible in the grand scheme – but that could make for an engaging character; somebody with a resolute morality who nonetheless is willing to bend it in service of a greater good.

It's at least more compelling than Mirai's limp, mealymouthed reason for not wanting to kill Metropoliman. Don't get me wrong – I have no issue with a character who doesn't want to kill. One of my all-time favorite anime stars a pacifist space hippy who solves war with the power of rock & roll, so I can assure you I'm not bloodthirsty. But Platinum End feels like it's trying to sell a perspective it doesn't actually understand or agree with. Mirai isn't opposed to killing because he believes in the inherent value of life, or thinks rehabilitation is important, or that there's inherent good in everyone and all are deserving of a chance at redemption. His entire reason is that, as a child, he was told by his father that hating people is bad, so he shouldn't do it. And that's it. It's a childishly broad, totally unconsidered moral hangup that feels almost like a strawman with how plainly its own creators don't buy it. I said this show regrets making Mirai the hero, and it's not just because it can't think of anything for him to do – it's because it plainly does not believe in any of the ideas or emotions he represents, and consistently fails to articulate them.

Meanwhile we continue to learn more about the inner workings of Metropoliman, including his name! I won't be using it because Metropoliman is way more fun to write. Anyway, when he's not being a scheming supervillain, he's going to a fancy high school that his grandfather owns, gawking at “babes” at a nearby middle school, and confiding in his friend(?) that he thinks pre-teen girls are at their most “pure” at that age. So, y'know, just a creep in all facets. And just to make sure we know he's an anime villain, he has a secret compound where he keeps his dead sister's frozen corpse in a big glass box for personal viewing. It's all extremely ridiculous, and if it weren't so god damn creepy it would almost be funny enough to really turn this show into a trash fire worth watching. Though considering the guy has also conscripted the help of a teenage serial killer who he helped break out of jail, that might come next week.

For now though, Platinum End continues to feel like a mess being hastily written and rewritten episode by episode. Our hero remains an inert slug with an equally gormless female lead attached to his hip. Our villain has already stopped being impressive and became a stone-faced punchline. The only real bright spot is our new secondary protagonist, and at this point it's more a question of how long before he too loses anything interesting about him.

Sidenote: I didn't want to derail the rest of the review over this, but the bit about Mukaido's angel, Baret, being a highly knowledgeable angel and being demoted for “flaunting that knowledge” is hilarious in the worst way. In case there was any doubt this infamous page from Bakuman. wasn't sincere, we now know that in Ohba's world, even God hates women who are smarter than him.

Rating:

Platinum End is currently streaming on Crunchyroll and Funimation.